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Image 1: 00 PM through 11:30 PM.]] achewood TV GUIDE ACHEWOOD COUNTY - AT&T BROADBAND 00 PM | 10:30 PM | 11:00 PM | 11:30 PM NBC ER In a must-see episode, the ghost of Dr. Green comes back from the dead to extract the fatal tumor from inside his own corpse's brain. Special guest appearance by Eriq La Salle, who kneels and pumps his fist as the tumor is eviscerated and thrown to the ground. LAW & ORDER When a body fails to appear during the opening sequence, Detectives Briscoe and Green grow increasingly irritable. "Yeah, well maybe it's YOUR fault!" yells Briscoe. "MY fault?" retorts Green. "Maybe if you'd had more kids we'd have more skells to chalk!" Briscoe strikes Green, but Green quickly proves himself the superior combatant. CBS SURVIVOR (con't) Host Jeff Probst loses his credit card. When it does not appear within 36 hours, he votes everyone off the island. CSI It is discovered that Anthrax is being spread via 25¢ video poker payouts. A tangential but substantive journey through entomological evidence ultimately leads the pathology unit to its culprit: a cicada-loving pit boss with ties to an Al-Qaeda sister organization. SURVIVOR (con't) Survivors are shown running through the streets of Bangkok with Jeff Probst's credit card. Among their purchases: alcohols, fats. FOX World's Worst Convenience Store Assassination-Style Murders Watch with host J. Clifton Wright as security cameras from around the world catch ruthless sociopaths doing what they do best: binding the feet and hands of convenience store clerks, then placing small-caliber weapons to their temples and blowing them away. Miami A woman's worst fears are realized when her giant schnauzer decides that it's Dog's Day Out and collapses her entire home, striking at the outside walls with its large paws while she remains trapped within. Also: in a fit of irony, a baby jaguar is backed over by her master's Jaguar. PBS AMERICA'S TEST KITCHEN "The cast-iron pan: Godsend or Bitch Goddess?" AMERICA'S TEST KITCHEN "Great demi-glace in under five days!" KIT GITRIDGE'S THE LARDING NEEDLE (1977) FAST FRACTIONS Can your child compute fractions of varying algebraic intensity before the overhead projector is wiped clean? (subtitled) FOOD TV GOOD EATS Host Alton Brown's laughable budget once again forces him to pretend that styrofoam balls are food molecules. EMERIL LIVE Emeril makes a pot roast. In a surreal turn of events, the pot roast suffers from inexplicable and ill-timed flatulence. Emeril tries to press on it with a spatula to get all the gas out but when he walks away it farts again. Hilarious. IRON CHEF Cod Erection. A&E LAW & ORDER A teenage psychopath uses his gymnastics abilities to murder random civilians. Briscoe and Green wear football helmets during all outdoor sequences. LAW & ORDER An attractive university student wants to trade grades for "favors" with an old professor. The professor, a widower with terminal edema, agrees to give her a C-minus if she dresses up like his late wife, but Briscoe and Green, disguised as the dean, burst out from behind a potted plant and arrest them both. © 2001-2002 Chris Onstad achewood.com

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